Athletics’ Twitter Roundup VII

Even Mariners are jumping at the chance of reading the Twitter roundup. Mandatory Credit: Joe Nicholson-USA TODAY Sports

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Another sad week has gone by. The Athletics, our beloved baseball team from Oakland, seem to be going from bad to worse and have dug themselves into the deepest darkest hole of their past three years. That being said, they’re still in the race for a playoff berth but Athletics fans have taken to Twitter, as they always do, with some light-heartedness to help distract from the truly terrible feeling we’re all feeling right now (it tastes a lot like sad). Here are this week’s highlights from the Twitter. As you can imagine, there are a number of hilarious tweets that I can’t share with you and maintain a PG rating so if you want to see the really funny (and in Fake Fosse’s case, the filthy) stuff, you have to follow me on Twitter!

Dear Melissa. Those dreams are called nightmares.

I still sorta support the trade, but it’s getting more and more difficult.

This would have been a lot funnier two months ago. Now we’re look at a “sad but true” scenario.

I remember those years. Nobody yelled at the TV during the Cust years more than I did!

It’s not the pitching that needs help. Also, it didn’t work. Have you tried blue?

He’s either a kind, gentle, optimistic fan or a complete idiot. Since he is the editor for this site, I’ll go with the latter. Wait, no, former. I’m going with former. DON’T FIRE ME!

Or maybe he’s a genius! #ShamelessPlug #ProductPlacement

This may be the most universally hated A’s tweet of the week…unless there’s one that says “Callaspo for MVP” that I missed.

You’d think he’d call it “Little Ray” or something like that but he calls it “2 wins in a row”.

I like this dude a lot but, clearly, he’s not watching many A’s games these days.

I’m a little surprised that Kuiper cleared waivers.

They won the very next day. But that’s been the only one.

And here I’ve been blaming this funk on every guy named Gabe I’ve ever met.

May I also suggest, Old Yeller, Schindler’s List and a steaming pile of bear feces?

Finally, someone that can find true positivity. If I never hear him say Ath-a-letics again…

Truer words have never been spoken by a grown adult posing as a toilet in a 45 year old stadium.

Swingin’ A’s. The Athletics website that makes dreams come true, brings families closer together, enacts real social change, cures rare diseases, and feeds the hungry but can’t explain why Alberto Callaspo is still in the lineup.

As always, if you come across a tweet that you find worthy of this esteemed column, just tag me in a reply so I’m sure to see it. While you’re tagging me, why not follow me and all the other great writers here. Our Twitter handles can be found at the top of each article. Here’s to a better week of more happy tweets! I’ve got a pleasant tribute planned for next weekend.