Jose Canseco cannot be controlled by conventional means

ANAHEIM, CA-CIRCA 1988: Jose Canseco of the Oakland A's takes BP against the California Angels at the Big A circa 1988 in Anaheim,California. (Photo by Owen C. Shaw/Getty Images) (Photo by Owen C. Shaw/Getty Images)
ANAHEIM, CA-CIRCA 1988: Jose Canseco of the Oakland A's takes BP against the California Angels at the Big A circa 1988 in Anaheim,California. (Photo by Owen C. Shaw/Getty Images) (Photo by Owen C. Shaw/Getty Images) /
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It has been a while since Jose Canseco had tweeted about his alien and/or Sasquatch friends. Granted, Canseco has been trying to woo Jennifer Lopez and had outed Mark McGwire for corking bats, but one had to hope that Canseco had not left his friends behind or that they had a falling out.

Fortunately, that does not appear to be the case. Although, in referencing aliens and Bigfoot, Canseco had a bit of a warning for the rest of us mortals.

Jose Canseco continues to confound us all

It makes sense that we cannot control Bigfoot or aliens. Aliens have technology the likes of which we can only imagine, especially if they can control space and time as Canseco had claimed in the past. Bigfoot is its own separate issue, given its ability to just disappear into the wilderness without a trace.

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But the idea that we cannot control Canseco because we cannot control those other entities is somewhat curious. Has he outed himself as a supernatural, mythical being? It would have explained his otherworldly abilities on the diamond in his younger days, as he blended power and speed in a way no one had ever done before in major league history.

Of course, that could have been all the steroids, but that is the logical conclusion. He very well could have tested positive for illegal substances, had drug testing been a part of baseball back then, due to his cryptid DNA and body type. Who can know how much pure testosterone is flowing through those veins?

But there is a way to control Canseco, or at least to keep him at bay and corralled for a period of time. All that one has to do is send a Barstool Sports intern after him. It may not be a glamorous job, but it is one that someone has to do.

Next. Canseco takes his shot with Jennifer Lopez. dark

Jose Canseco has warned us all that he cannot be controlled. At the same time, he may have outed himself as a cryptid, just like Bigfoot.

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