Jose Canseco provides news of the century
By David Hill
Oh, Jose Canseco. It would be impossible to create someone such as he as a fictional character as they would be considered too ridiculous to be plausible. However, despite his occasional bursts of insanity on Twitter, he has been a paragon of truth when it comes to the Steroid Era and, oddly, Alex Rodriguez‘s relationship with Jennifer Lopez.
Given his random bursts of insight, one has to entirely discount what Canseco has to say at their own risk. This leaves us to wonder if he potentially has the biggest news scoop of the century.
Jose Canseco with the scoop of the century
It is notable that Canseco refuses to say where he got this information from. Have the aliens or Bigfoot been hiding Tupac for all of these years? Did he apply for a job at Canseco’s petrol station? Was this nothing more than a drug fueled hallucination? Only Canseco knows for sure.
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Considering that he is in Las Vegas, it is possible that Canseco saw someone that looked like Tupac. Las Vegas is the land of Elvis impersonators after all, so having other famous celebrity impersonators would not be outside the realm of probability. Canseco, in an altered state of mind, could have wandered across one and thought that he found the real Tupac.
This revelation could be a gold mine for Canseco as well. He has attempted to sell weekends where people can spend that time in his company, promising Bigfoot sightings and real aliens as part of the enticement (totally not Ozzie Canseco in costume). Maybe he can add a chance to chat with Tupac as part of the package.
It is laughable to think that he could be correct here. And yet… There were questions about whether or not it was actually Tupac who was killed at the time of his shooting, leading to decades worth of conspiracy theories. Maybe Canseco has found out the truth – after all, no one would believe him at this point.
Jose Canseco now claims that Tupac is alive. That ball must have hit his head pretty hard, or his latest round of drugs were fairly potent.